Ass Toning Footwear – 2nd Edition

This article was first published on 13 February 2012 at http://www.RinggitWiseFool.blogspot.com. I have decided to republish it here at GenX GenY GenZ Dotcom, just in case Google delete/ban my Ringgit Wise Fool blog, for the benefit of all gentlemen by introducing a new  eye exercise that will also benefit their partner/spouse/girl friend. You ladies will thank me for introducing this eye exercise to your man too. You see, your man can perform this exercise without bothering you for hours at the mall as he won’t get tired and nag that you hurry up with your shopping; therefore. you can waste hours at the mall taking your sweet time visiting every shop and trying out as many dresses and shoes as you wish without him nagging you.

ass-toning-footwear

Every woman loves shoes and can’t  get enough of them. I can’t really understand why women need so many pairs of shoes. I have mentioned before in one of my articles that men hardly look at what shoes a woman is wearing UNLESS she is wearing a micro mini skirt and has long slender smooth legs which lead the guy’s vision to the shoes (which is obstructing the guy from checking out the legs in full). Now, you ladies, if you don’t understand what I just said, the guys are admiring your species’ smooth long slender legs and whatever shoes you are wearing is of no significance. Even if you are wearing a RM2K shoe with diamonds, most guys will not care less and think the diamonds are fake anyway. However, if you have long slender smooth legs and wear RM2 Japanese slippers, the guys will be drooling when they see a lady with long slender legs with mini skirts or hot pants 🙂

Here is what I mean, if you ladies still cannot comprehend what I wrote above. Who cares what shoes go with those beautiful long slender legs belonging to Jessica Alba. Whatever shoes she wears is irrelevant.

jessica-alba

 

Here is another example where the shoe is irrelevant but I don’t think any guy will even bother to peek at the shoes she’s wearing after seeing those legs!

legs

Of course, most if not all ladies wish to have legs like Jessica Alba’s, shown in the first picture 🙂  Here is where researchers in a University and modern technology in manufacturing can assist the ladies achieve beautiful slender legs and tight asses without them going on a strict diet or liposuction/plastic surgery to get the figure they desire.

Introducing FITFLOP to you men (and ladies who are not aware of this “miracle” product) which is supposed to tighten ladies’ buttocks.

Here is what is mentioned at FitFlop website:

How They Work

FitFlop. Get a workout while you walk™

FitFlop footwear is biomechanically engineered to help tone and tighten your leg muscles while you walk in them. Studies at the Centre for Human Performance at London South Bank University (LSBU) show that normal walking in FitFlop sandals* can help:

    • – help increase leg and bottom muscle activity (up to 30%). (so you feel less ache in your hips and knees),


    • – absorb more shock than a normal shoe (up to 22%),


    • – help realign ground force reaction closer to your joints,


  • – reduce foot pressure and pain from heel spurs and plantar fasciitis.**


FitFlop sandals wearers have also reported relief from plantar fasciitis, heel spurs, chronic back pain, sciatica, osteoarthritis, RLS (restless leg syndrome), scoliosis and degenerative disc disease.

FitFlop footwear features patent- pending muscle-loading Microwobbleboard™ technology and was independently tested at Salford University in Manchester by Dr Philip Graham Smith & Richard Jones to verify their pro-muscle activity prior to launch. (FitFlop has also been approved by the American Podiatric Medical Association – APMA).

 

Since it is a biomechanically engineered (I’ve got no idea what this means) product and scientifically proven at a University that it can increase buttock muscle activity, I guess it must be true. Below are ads of FitFlop.

fitflop

Zooming in on the lady ad, it states that the FITFLOP sandals can increase muscle activation on the buttock up to 30% by simply wearing the sandals! WOW! They have even researched and measured exactly how many percentage of the ass muscle can be activated.

fitflop-2

 

However, do note, the same was not mentioned for the man in the ad??? Actually, they should also emphasize the buttock thingy for the men as girls are into men’s asses. When girls see a young man in tight jeans, the first thing they most probably check out is his ass! You guys don’t believe me, ask your female friends and see if they concur with me.

Here is another ad by FitFlop on their ladies scandals emphasizing on the ass. And once again, the shoe design is irrelevant (if you seriously look at the ad, the shoe kind of blend with the colour of the flooring material, making it not noticeable and one of them is even hidden by her leg and this is an ad to sell shoes); but the tight ass and long slender legs catches my attention.

Fitflop 3.jpg

With ads like the one above, emphasizing the ass with a tight short dress to show of her slender legs,  women are sure to go and buy FitFlop! No need to sweat or work out and yet get 30% muscle activity in the ass by just wearing the shoes, it’s a miracle. Besides, FitFlop, Sketchers and Reebok also have similar shoes that they claim can tone a person’s ass. (Update 2016, both Reebok and Sketches where subsequently fined for false advertising). 

Even our local shoe designer Thomas Chan has joined in the fray on asses where his shoes can accentuate a woman’s natural figure making the ass jut out profoundly, hehe. See picture below:

thomas-chan

Zooming in, below is a banner in front of the Thomas Chan outlet at 1U where it advertises their orthotic shoes which are suppose to be very comfortable.

Thomas Chan 2.jpg

With respect to the photo above, here are my comments (from a man’s perspective):

BEFORE with flats – firstly the model looks pretty, and that’s about it. Well, she’s “flat” chested too.

AFTER photo with Thomas Chan Orthotic Shoe – I am surprised that a little bit of heel can make a lady’s buttocks jut out that much!!? Got to admit her tight ass kind of stands out; but heck, it also makes her tummy area protrude outwards even more than her chest!!! What I will say is that I have seen many ladies wearing tight dresses with high heels that also make their butts kind of jut out but not their tummy.

They should have used a model wearing a tight dress like the FitFlop ads above in short blue dress or ultra short hot pants. Moreover, since she’s wearing long pants, the first thing that came to my mind is that maybe she also changed to those padded panties for the photo shoot with the Orthotic shoes. I am not implying she is wearing padded panties but since she’s wearing pants I will never know.

However, to be fair, Thomas Chan is not marketing their shoes as an ass toning product but as a product that provide Ultimate Comfort to the person wearing it.

These ass toning shoes and sandals are not cheap. It cost few hundred ringgit for a pair; but, since when do the ladies really care about how much it cost to make them beautiful. Young ladies and old women are buying these shoes like nobody’s business, thus, making tons of money for the shoe companies. And my mother and wife are among them!

Here’s my story about FitFlop. Sometime near Christmas last year (2011), I was at MetroJaya MidValley with my wife and MJ was offering RM50 cash voucher if one spends RM300 and above in a single receipt. So, my darling curvy wife said she wanted to get a FitFlop. I followed her to the shoe section and got a shock when I saw the prices of the FitFlop sandals. A few hundred ringgit for slippers? Huh, my ass photostat money ar? I guess my wife was thinking of my benefit as I’ll be able to gain RM50 cash voucher (but I guess it never crossed her mind that she will be burning RM300+ away). I asked her what is so great about the shoe? And she replied that it tones the butt! I was like huh? Her ass looks fine to me. Anyway, no point arguing with her over her ass, so I let it be, as long as she is happy.

Now the thing is, the design she wanted in her size was sold out. What I noticed was every lady  who went to the FitFlop section was attracted to this particular model, the Rokkit Diamond. Here’s a photo of it:

 

Fitflop Rokkit Diamond.jpg

But Metrojaya had the model below, Rokkit Electra in many sizes, which is slightly cheaper:

fitflop-rokkit-electra

Actually, I have to admit that the Rokkit Diamond is much much nicer than the Electra in real life. So my wife was like spending lots of time trying out several models and sizes.

Let me tell you what I found from my own no budget research at Metrojaya. There was a lady there telling my wife she was wearing the Electra and she was hellava fat. Then, there was another lady wearing a FitFlop looking at the Rokkit Diamond too, and her body was nothing great but like most other aunties. Oh yah, by then I have checked out all the prices of the FitFlop models and was actually looking at what shoes the ladies there were wearing as they walked by me (since I had nothing better to do while my wife was busy trying out many different pairs of FitFlops) and if they were wearing FitFlop I would correlate it with their asses. I concluded then and there that the FitFlop shoes cannot transform fat legs to slim legs and huge buttocks to tight firm asses that can fit into jeans size 24 (as per photo of the girl in blue dress above). The ladies who buy these shoes are paying for the thrill of fantasizing they can get attractive slim legs and tight asses by wearing the shoes, hahaha. I tell you no woman will buy FitFlop shoes if they were to advertise it with a real woman instead of using skinny boney airport runway chested model with slim legs that won’t look nice in a cheongsam.

But because MJ did not have the Rokkit Diamond in my wife’s size, she was willing to compromise and buy the Electra. However I told my wife, what is the point of “wasting” my money and buy something she doesn’t really like. If she really likes the FitFlop Rokkit Diamond, then go buy it somewhere else and forget about the RM50 MetroJaya cash voucher.

Like I said in my article Money Charity Love (link removed), money equates to love, and I love my wife tremendously more than anything on earth, so what is RM50 when considering the fact she is willing to buy a pair of slippers (to me sandals and slippers are the same) costing  RM300+. So we headed to Isetan at The Gardens and, too bad for me, they had the Rokkit Diamond in the size my wife wanted. Deep inside my heart, I was praying that Isetan would also not have the FitFlop Rokkit Diamond size my wife wanted. I guess god was on her side that day as I was coughing out blood while I swiped my credit card to pay for RM300+ slippers!

My mother has a FitFlop too. She asked her sis to buy from US and bring it all the way here to Malaysia when she came for a holiday last year (2011)! Can’t really understand why she did not buy it here in KL and had to have it air flown in, women thingy I guess. And 2 weeks back (in 2012) when we went to 1U, my mother wanted to go to Thomas Chan (local designer) to buy a pair of orthotic shoes. I followed her to the outlet and once again I was shocked to see the prices. She wanted to buy 2 pairs and I told her, try out one first lah, if comfortable to wear, then only get another pair later. I did ask my mum yesterday (referring to the time I was drafting this article in 2012) and she said the Thomas Chan shoe she bought were comfortable.

Having said the above, for those who have some kind of health problems, the right pair of shoes can do wonders. I have an uncle who had a neck operation and was sickly for years and hardly goes out until his friend recommended a pair of infra-red technology shoes where the inside of the sole was molded from his feet. After wearing this made to order shoe, this uncle of mine (70+ years old) is  much better and even bought a new car to go jalan jalan! The shoe is a Taiwanese brand and cost more than RM3K!

 

CONCLUSION

Nowadays, all I do is Eat, Sleep and Shit, and not doing much exercise except for my fingers (when I am typing articles for my blogs) and right foot (when I step on the gas and brake pedals while I am driving my children). Actually, I am getting fatter too while I write my articles as my wife keeps bringing food to me with my coffee.  So, I am now considering if I should go get a pair of FitFlop slippers and wear them at home to get my 30% ass muscles activated (but FitFlop did not state this fact for male asses) when I walk to and fro between my computer table when I am awake to the dining hall or bedroom or toilet. And with this miracle ass toning product, I’ll be able to make the girls, young and old alike, go wild when they see my butt in tight jeans when I go to the malls, hahaha.

And thanks to my wife teaching me about ass toning shoes, I have now found a new hobby that  also activates my eye muscles while at the malls – that’s to take a glimpse at shoes worn by young slim curvy ladies who are wearing tight dresses and correlate it with their tight butts, hahaha. You guys can now also join me in this eye exercising hobby too and got a valid reason for doing so when our wife or girlfriend catch us in the act, reason being to assist them in finding the perfect shoes to accentuate their  natural curves 🙂

Below content are new :

It is now year 2016 and my wife’s first Fitflop that cost me close to RM400 has been throw into the rubbish bin years ago. I would have assumed that a pair of slippers costing more than RM300 could last at least for ten years or so, I guess I was mistaken. She then subsequently got herself another new pair of FitFlop. But I can tell you one thing for sure, her ass is the same even after wearing Fitflops, hahahaha.

Now that my wife spends a lot of time in Melbourne, during the winter time she would burn my hard earned money of boots, so much so there’s no place  to store them in my freaking small apartment!!!  But because I love her and wants her to be happy, I have to put up with her shoes!!!

Earlier in this article, I mentioned I can’t comprehend why women need to get new pairs of shoes every now and then. Well, I finally understood and told my readers the reason in my Top 10 Credit Cards 2016 article:.

With so many shopping malls everywhere, the probability of us using our credit cards on impulse is very high. Did you know that over the years many studies have shown that a very unique species termed as females get more joy from shopping that anything else! They don’t like to be rushed and gets continuous pleasure from hours of shopping as they splash money on stuff they don’t need. They never get tired from shopping and can shop from day to night, so much so, their shoes wear off pretty quick and that’s why they need a new pair even though they just bought one the day before. And nowadays most ladies have a pair of shoes (actually slippers that cost more than RM300) that tones their butt while they shop. Men on the other hand are easily satisfied in mere minutes and will happily go to sleep………….. what is your corrupted brain thinking? I am talking about men’s stomachs lah, hahaha. It has been proven that people who own credit cards spend more than people who use cash. That is why you see most rich men practice paying with cash even if they have a few credit cards in their wallet (most probably “useless” premier credit cards issued from their Premier/Priority/Privilege Banking accounts).

Last but not least, if you ladies ever catch your man looking at another lady’s ass, don’t be jealous but be thankful that he’s wasting his precious time looking for the perfect shoe to  accentuate your natural curves 🙂

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